Who is Steve Pulignani? That’s a question many people would like answered. The following is a detailed biography of Steve, created by combing through the remnants of his blog, archives portions of the multi-authored Gay Men Rule, and the multi-authored QueerDeviations. Some of the material is from the memories of readers, since Steve constantly removes or alters entries. The footnotes (listing the exact blog entries where information was pulled from) aren’t included, unfortunately, but you can find much of the material through websites such as the WayBackMachine.
Steve Pulignani (also known as Steve Rouse)1 was born in July 1968 following a 10-month-long gestation period.2 He was one of a pair of twins.3 Steve’s father was an ardent Republican and the family was Jewish.4 His father, who was born circa 1915,5 was possibly a Holocaust survivor, and died sometime between 30 January and 18 June 2007.6 Steve’s mother was born circa 1918/1919,7 and died in 1987.8 Of note, no individuals named Pulignani died in either 1987 or in the January to June 2007 timespan.9 Steve has a sister and at least four nephews and nieces. He also claims to have several grandnieces or grandnephews.As a child he lived in the Washington, D.C. or Baltimore area. He remembered a trip to “Rehobeth” when he was four, in 1972. His family moved to New York in 1975, living there for two years. He was caught shoplifting in 1976 with his brother.10 The Pulignani family moved to Bel Air, California in August 1977. They moved back to Washington, D.C. in 1979. At age 10 or 11, he smoked marijuana for the first time. He was sent to boarding school in 1981. The summer of 1983 was spent in Pennsylvania.11 Also that Summer, his next-door-neighbor dated baseball player Cal Ripken and Steve saw her giving him fellatio while parked in his car.12 The following year he visited Italy, England, France, Germany, Austria, and Switzerland. In 1985 he visited Greece, Spain, Norway, Sweden, and Israel. He worked for Kentucky Fried Chicken that year.13In between his travels, Steve was hospitalized for depression at age 16, sometime in 1984 or 1985. He was sent to a halfway-house, which he didn’t like.14 Steve worked for a video store in 1986, the same year as his first sexual experience at age 17 or 18.15 It is not clear whether this experience was before or after a terrible event in his life:
“A 4 week-long abduction, a bunch of torturing, sexual assault, and the witnessing of the murder of the other kidnapped boy; had left me messed up enough; to where my mother sent me to therapy, for guidance. The counseling became sexually inappropriate. Add coming to terms with my gayness; and I was a suicidal mess.”16
Steve attempted suicide in 1987 and was hospitalized. His bills were over $25,000.17 While he was hospitalized, Steve’s mother was killed as a result of a car accident in 1987.18 Steve’s sister called him at the hospital to tell them their mother was having brain surgery. But Steve could not leave the hospital where he was at, due to some billing issues. Later, his father blamed him for the accident, saying his suicide attempt had distracted her while driving. Steve noted that his mother was rear-ended, and that he was not to blame.19
Steve gave up smoking in 1987.20 Steve had a friend named Linda in 1989 who was an actress. At the time he knew her, he was still closeted.21 Also in 1989, he had a friend named Theresa, who was his last girlfriend.
Steve was living in New York City in the Spring of 1991, getting his Master’s Degree at the Pratt Institute. He met a man and had a three-year romance with him.22 He had returned to Seattle by May 2001, and had not returned to the Washington, D.C. area since 1996.
Steve began blogging in June 2006. In September 2007, he went back and added earlier entries from his journals, the earliest dating to 2001.
In December 2001, he visited his friend James in the hospital.23
On New Year’s Day 2002, Steve was in the hospital suffering from a high fever caused by a kidney infection. His friend Scott visited with him and Steve was convinced Scott was in love with him.24 Steve’s friend James died from AIDS and he attended his memorial ceremony in January 2002.25 In February he watched three movies with his friend Stephanie.26 Steve worked for a corporation in Seattle from 12 March 2002 until 2 April 2002. He resigned on 19 March.27 He visited San Francisco in August 2002, drinking wine with his friends Jack, Jeff, and Mike. He imbibed too much and spent the night throwing up.28 Steve dated “J.” for two-and-a-half months in the summer of 2002. He was concerned because “J.” was HIV positive.29 Meanwhile, Steve’s brother was suffering from cocaine addiction and was in rehab.30
On 23 March 2003, Steve went to the Eagle in Seattle and made out with a “dude.” They exchanged numbers.31 From May through August of 2003, Steve abused drugs and was apparently unemployed, staying home and watching “Days of Our Lives.”32 In September 2003, Steve spent time catching up on the phone with his friends Joyce, Anne, and Linda, along with his sister. He wrote letters to Gary, Steve, and Rick.33
He was hospitalized for the first 10 days in March 2005 and was on disability leave from work.34 Steve felt sad in April 2005 over a depression and other health problems that had been developed over the last five years.35 The depression continued into February 2006.36 Later that month he moved to Baltimore due to his father’s Alzheimer’s.37
After his arrival in Baltimore he worked for a large publishing company, which he later quit. Unfortunately, he was diagnosed with thyroid tumors38 afterwards and had to take a job working for his sister because he couldn’t afford the high COBRA insurance premiums.39 By November 2007, he reported that he was cancer free.40 Unfortunately, his thyroid medications have side effects that include: manic behavior, depression, Bi-Polar disorder, fatigue, shortness of breath, heart palpitations, weight loss, vomiting, and diarrhea.4142
Steve is a Baltimore Orioles fan and he goes to game whenever he can. “And when I can’t afford it, I watch them on television.43
In January 2007, Steve had a conversation with his father, who was suffering from Alzheimers, but was apparently still able to remember that Steve was gay and chastise him for being so.44
Steve underwent a major depression in the summer of 2007:
“I scanned around to see: the cobwebs, inches of dust, the stack of dishes (taking notice of the fruit flies and ants colonizing the sink), the glasses, utensils, and dishes piled around my computer (covered in mold; where there was once remnants of food and liquids), the dead houseplants from no watering (and from not opening up the shades to allow them to get sunlight), the pile of mail and newspapers fallen over & sprawled on the floor, all the delivery boxes of pizzas & subs, too many bottles of delivery soda (to count); and the stacks of thousands of stories, 2 novels, dozens of songs & hundreds of drawings, I did; over the past few months.
I listened to the 100+ voicemail messages dating back to June.
I opened up bills which have been sitting around; just as long.
I read newspapers; which I bought months ago and never looked at.
I called all the companies which I’d ordered from online; to see if I could return all the purchases (which I can’t afford).
And I finally answered my door, for the first time in months (when someone knocked on it). It was my elderly neighbor. The nosey, annoying one. She baked me a cake, handed it to me and said, “I don’t know what’s going on, but I hope things get better for you, Steve.” I cried uncontrollably in her face. I couldn’t help it. I didn’t know people had noticed a change in me. Because I haven’t really told anyone, all which is going on. But people notice things; we all do. I said, “Thank you, I’m going to be fine; things are rough right now; please don’t worry about me. The most important thing is that when all is said and done; I’ll be fine.”45
On 17 July 2007, Steve was mugged at a major shopping mall. He wasn’t carrying money, but had his credit cards and keys (the keys were taken). Two teenagers, at least one of whom was black, held guns pointed at his temples and after he was forced to the ground, to the back of his head. The young men later went on to attack an 11-year-old epileptic girl, who was murdered.46 He ran from the scene and ran into a former Secret Service, FBI, and CIA man, who called the police for him. The detective who interviewed him had beautiful green eyes.47 Afterwards, he went to Rehoboth Beach with Joshua for five days.48 Before he left he went to the murdered girl’s viewing: “Additionally, I went to that girl’s viewing. I had to go. It was difficult. The family was extremely poor, and the mother was in hysterics. One couldn’t help, but cry; in reaction to the mom. I ’looked very rich‘ compared to the other mourners (I, and my friends, were the only ones wearing suits). I was afraid to tell them who I was. I only stayed for about 15 minutes. Because, I wasn’t prepared for grief-stricken anger, directed at me. “49
Strangely enough, Steve linked his initial blog entry to another 11-year-old girl who died from epilepsy.50 No newspaper accounts of the murder of the young girl have ever surfaced.
On 31 July he met with a newly appointed female Assistant District Attorney who informed him that the handsome detective had been a Playgirl model in the 1990s.51 It seems strange that a female lawyer would share such personal information with anyone. Steve believed it was to set his mind at ease. One wonders whether an Assistant District Attorney would risk her new career in such a manner.
In August 2007, Steve developed a horrible case of hives. He felt these were stress-related due to his latest book, having issues with his publisher and editor. He was also nervous because he was speaking in front of a neighborhood group at that time.52 An alternate explanation is provided by “T. P.” who recalled:
“Anyway we were to meet downtown near where he supposedly lives. He emailed me a couple hours prior telling me he couldn’t wait to meet. He then stood me up, leaving me sweating and pacing for an hour in front of the café. Later he said he was rushed to the ER with hives!”53Later in August he was out jogging and met a man jogging who became a friend.54 A few days later he suffered from some illness that caused vomiting.55 The murder case had legal proceedings, which Steve initially called a “trial,” but later decided were actually a preliminary hearing. He reported that there would be two separate trials.56 At one of the court events he met the girl’s parents and took them out to lunch.Steve lives near John Hopkins University, two blocks from Wyman Park.57 This apparently a dangerous part of town, because three homeless people were found hanged in the park in 2006-2007.58 This is interesting because a blog that is dedicated to covering murders in Baltimore has not reported any hanging deaths for the park in 2006 or 2007.59
Steve suffered from seizures in the summer of 2007. He was taking Klonopin to control this condition later in the year.60 They had doubled his medication around September 2007, and did so again in early December of that year.61 Around September, Steve was awarded a $5,500 shopping spree at the Nordstrom’s department store. This was a result of Steve helping to raise money for a school.62
The two teenagers (the older one was 16) who had mugged Steve were arraigned in mid-September. They were charged with:
“Murder, Second Degree; Manslaughter, First Degree; Armed Robbery; Carjacking; Robbery; Assault, First Degree; Assault, Second Degree; Grand Theft; Theft less than $500; Handgun on person; Handgun used in crime; Possession of unregistered firearm.”63
Steve met a man named “D. at a local convenience store.” They had previously met in 2003 at the same store. 64 He told this man he was in love with him in early October 2007.65 Around 10 October, he was admitted to a hospital for some tests.66 On 20 October 2007, Steve’s friend Eric died in a motorcycle accident. Steve was picked up and went to sit Shiva with the family for seven days, during which time he was not allowed to bathe. He later posted pictures of Eric on his blog, and a controversy developed because someone pointed out that the pictures did not match the Eric who died in a motorcycle accident in Baltimore on that date and who was not married. Steve responded that the friend he was talking about actually lived in Florida and that he had flown to that state and taken to Eric’s house. Eric was converting to Judaism, and there was a fight among his Christian family members and Eric’s wife.67 One aspect of the questioning of Steve about the obituary mix-up was that Steve began to refer to people as “cyber bullies.”68
Steve’s sister and her family were embezzled $50,000 by a contractor who was supposed to replace a large deck for them. Meanwhile, his brother had to pay a $500,000 settlement in a sexual harassment case.69 The same brother takes his family to a different place for Thanksgiving each year, serving
dinner at a shelter.70 On November 2007, Steve visited Philadelphia, Atlantic City, and New York City.71 On Thanksgiving Day in 2007, he volunteered to serve dinner at a local soup kitchen.72 On 28 November 2007, Steve had a lengthy car ride with a woman to visit a friend with cancer. A long dispute broke out between the menstruating driver (apparently his sister) and Steve.73
In early December 2007, Steve and his boyfriend “D.” attended the Army-Navy football game, along with his nephew.74 He was also supposed to attend an exclusive shopping spree at a Nordstrom’s store on 8 December, following a stay at a hotel in Tyson’s Corner. However, after another blogger noted that the event was a non-exclusive VIP invitation event, he chose not to go.75
Steve has two dogs,76 plays Yahtzee with about seven friends on Friday night.77 He was diagnosed as a genius, supposedly because of his long gestation.78 He has a long and thick penis.79 He had a nocturnal emission in the hospital following an appendectomy.80 Steve believes he is a good boyfriend because:
“I don’t know if it’s because I have a big dick, or that I have a considerable amount of money, or if it’s that I’m an incredibly sweet guy, or if it’s due to my looks, or if I’m skilled at picking the right men for myself; BUT boyfriends don’t usually run away. It seems to make them love me more; and I’m grateful for that (as long as they don’t pity me. Cuz some have done that, and it enrages me)” (emphasis Steve).81
He also uses lube when masturbating.82
Family is important to Steve. One of his grandparents was a United States Senator.83 His parents are deceased. He has a sister, who is married, and a brother with several children. He has a nephew in pre-kindergarten in Bethesda, a niece in first grade in Georgetown, and a niece in 3rd grade in Glenelg.84 Another nephew is a junior at the Naval Academy.85 Steve’s sister has toddler grandchildren. She is tall and skinny.86
There are some conflicting elements to Steve’s life. He has mentioned several times that he has monetary problems,87 and yet he also reports that: “It was prize given to me as part of a donation package for doing an auction. That’s what we wealthy people do Darin. We donate money and give each other gifts as tax write-off’s rather than playing trolls on the net.”88
He was reportedly the best friend of blogger Marc Luetkemeyer, someone he knew since 1979, when Marc was only four-years-old.89 Steve has told at least one person that he and Marc were in the band DiamondFistWerny in Seattle, although articles about the band fail to mention either individual.90 Marc tragically died on 20 August 2006, and Steve later maintained his weblog91 before deleting the entire website sometime after August 2007. It seems unusual that although they were such good friends, Steve failed to ever mention Marc in the older entries he has added. In any case, Steve has also claimed that Marc was not the individual’s real name anyways.
So the big question remains, “Who is Steve Pulignani?” Is he a wealthy, good-looking, rich, big-cocked homosexual? Or is he a very disturbed man with a vivid imagination and too much time on his hands? Only he knows for sure.
